Better In Time

things are getting hard, i think. i have no one to blame but myself. i spend whole of my days on internet and listen to songs that could remind me of him, read broken-hearted's quotes that heal nothing and stalk his profile which is more frequent than before. HAIHH. however, i'm grateful enough to have someone who is willingly to hear my stories and try to understand how i feel. thanks awak. :) we're actually in the same circumstance that's why dya faham lebih.

it is about time, i suppose. time will heal, kan? it may sound abit cliche, but that's the truth. 

macam kat lagu bawah nie. enjoy. :)

                    

Deactivate

What's crackalackin', people?

i don't have much to say here, just want to inform my friends that

"i am deactivating my Facebook account"

so, if you find yourself searching for my profile but you couldn't find it, don't worry. i'm not unfriend, blocking you or what. i just need to keep myself away from Facebook for awhile. that's the only way to forbid myself from stalking 'his' profile. :(

it has been a habit already, and i have to get rid it or at least diminish it. it hurts me seeing his profile while both of us are nothing than just 'friends on facebook'.

move on already, ayu. seriously.

(how i wish 'moving on' is as easy as its sound)

:(

Love,

Ayu Othman

You

he asked, "do you still love me?"

i looked down, hesitant to reply

i, myself did not know the answer

the confusion stroke to my head

i wouldnt say i hate him

his betrayal wouldn't give me a hatred towards him, ever

how could i hate somebody that i ever loved

ever loved, ayu?

ever 'loved' you said?

hmm.

i looked into his eyes, i smiled

that face, how could i hate, how could i forget

"i don't know if i still love you, but i do know that i don't need you anymore"

i walked away, reluctantly

will i ever see that face again?

but i must be strong, i must be

i don't want to be hurt again,

let alone to hurt him.

i wish he can find somebody who can truly love him, not to hurt him and give him a true happiness

forgive me, i failed to do so

forgive me, for breaking my promise to not leave you

forgive me, please, for everything

  

Love,

Ayu Othman